Crazy

I can't. I'm having some sort of midlife crisis. I can't. I feel crazy and shaky and stuck. So stuck. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I can't deal. I can't. I'm having a fit inside. I feel like everything in me is shaking. I am afraid. I am afraid. I don't want this. I want something else. How do I get it? I feel stuck. Trying to tell myself that I am not stuck. It is not forever. I can do anything. Anything. It can happen if I need it. And I need it now, but I can't have it now. I can't think whole thoughts. I almost can't hold my fingers still enough to type. I'm so irritated with myself. I'm stifled. I hate it. fjdklshaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa